Nits 2 - Coming Soon to a Head Near You

Monday, 30 March 2009

Okay. So here is what I've learned about our first head lice experience.

  • It's a right royal pain in the proverbial.
  • There is nothing more excrutiatingly frustrating than an itinerant louse. And no, I'm not talking about your husband.
  • Your kids will have no scalp skin left if you're as hell bent on combing as I was.
  • Your washing machine will get the workout of its life and your house will look like a Chinese laundry for a month.
  • You will itch and scratch your own head to kingdom come, even though there is not a shred of a nit on your head (trust me, I've checked).
  • You'll drive your kids bananas reminding them not to go within 10 feet of any other child and if they share a hat, hair band or comb, they will be dipped on lysol when they get home.

If you want to get rid of head lice once and for all, forget the expensive chemicals and la-de-da nit kits. Follow the steps below and your infestation will be packing its bags in no time.


Slather your child's head with conditioner and water until it's a right mess. Wrap the head in clingwrap and put a shower cap over it. Have the head go to sleep. Get it up early and add a little water, then comb with a nit comb until you see nothing when wiped onto a paper towl. Rinse comb in a bowl of hot water as you go.

Do this every day for a week. It will take an hour or more for kids with long hair and is horrible but better fastidious than overrun by rampant, itinerant lice.

In the meantime, wash every pillow, blanket, sheet, doona, soft furnishing cover you can. Hang it in the sun to dry. Stuffed toys and non washables go into a sealed plastic bag and in the freezer for 48 hours or in a plastic bag, sealed tightly for 2 weeks if the freezer is full of lasagne and ice cream.

After the week of combing, re-comb every 3-4 days for two weeks. Then check head weekly.

MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL: tell your child's teacher. If your child is clean and you resend its head to school to be reinfected by other kids whose parents do absolutely nothing but sip margaritas all day and do jack all about the problem, you will hop up and down so mad, you will probably pop. And scratch.

ALSO MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL: drill your child to NEVER share hats, combs, brushes, head bands or anything that touches the hair. Ask them not to roll around on soft furnishings or play with each others' hair.

Saying a little prayer also can't go astray. If all else fails, the shaved head cabbage patch look is in. Trust me, it's tempting.

Nit-crushing mums unite!
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